...Because I have too much time on my hands!
The Figure-Outerist: Jennifer Garner is a private detective
hired by a flashlight manufacturer(Jeff Fahey) to find his 113 missing
relatives. Also, something about aliens.
Mrs. Fraidy Pants: A sitcom in which a daycare center
operator is constantly terrified by ghosts, much to the chagrin of her
long suffering husband(the guy from JAG.)
Darwin And The Dude: Former race car driver and his pet chimp are exposed to radiation. They gain superpowers and are hired by the President Of The United States to solve crimes.
Someone hire me!
In the pretty good but not perfect movie Daredevil(2003) Matt Murdock(The Ben Affleck) doesn't need sight to know that Elektra Natchios is smokin'. They have a"meet cute" in the diner. It turns out that Elektra doesn't like to be followed, even by blind dudes, which leads to a gravity defying fight on a playground seesaw in full view of a group of children.
Elektra's father is murdered, so she does what any of us would do in that situation: practices crazy martial arts with sais and dresses up in a costume for revenge! Gratuitous violence against sandbags!
Elektra finds herself outmatched by wacko assassin Bullseye(Colin Ferrel.)She gets skewered by her own weapon, first through her hand, and then right through her pretty little heart!
Ouch! Somebody call a doctor! Perhaps Jennifer Garner's character from Dallas Buyer's Club.
BONUS: The DVD has a behind the scenes special which aired on HBO, hosted by Her Royal Lipiness. There's a cute moment in which Garner expresses love for those sea monkeys that were advertised on the backs of old comic books. Worth the price of the whole thing!
Arthur(2011) is a remake of the classic 1981 film starring Dudley Moore. It features Russell Brand, as the title character, a playboy who spends his days engaging in drunken shenanigans, much to the chagrin of his caretaker/parental figure Hobson. Hobson is played by Helen Mirren here, and John Gielgud in the original. Apart from the gender switch, the characters are essentially the same: Hobson is a Brit with a dry biting wit who doesn't put up with Arthur's man child shit!
Arthur will be cut off form his inheritance if he does not marry Susan, his mother's assistant(played by JENNIFER GARNER!)Susan is not very likeable, but she sure doesn't deserve what happens to her in the movie:
A drunken Susan shows up to seduce Arthur. Arthur wants none of it despite the fact that Susan is wearing sex lingerie. Susan attacks Arthur, and as the two of them are crawling around on the floor, Susan gets stuck on the bottom of Arthur's bed.
You see, Arthur has this big round bed that hovers in the air on a magnetic field. Susan crawls under it and the metal in her outfit causes her to stick to it. HA HA!
That never would have happened to her character in 13 Going on 30!
